And a couple of weeks ago, the curse struck again. But before I go into that, let me show you how the birthday curse has affected our lives.
Our dog Sparky died on our grandpa's birthday: November 10.
My Papa Russ died on his wife's birthday: March 22. The day after is my mom's birthday.
My uncle got in a head-on collision on Trio #3's birthday: December 13. Luckily he survived.
A couple of weeks ago, we were getting ready to celebrate Trio #1's birthday, July 10.
But unfortunately, we were not really in the celebrating mood.
My Grammy, Sara Jayne Woolsey Meeves, was in the hospital. She started having stomach pains and was admitted to the hospital with a bowel obstruction. They put a tube in her nose that helped remove all of her stomach contents so that they would stop putting unnecessary pressure on her bowels. As she was in the hospital healing, she was eating ice chips (her favorite) and she aspirated some of the water. It would be fine for anyone else to do that, but Grammy had really bad lungs. She has really bad asthma, and her lungs are not very functioning. Because of the aspiration of the water, she contracted pneumonia. For someone that has bad lungs....pneumonia is a cuss word.
She got moved up to the Adult ICU. They tried to put her on a c-pap machine, but she was extremely uncomfortable and was not wearing it appropriately or long enough. That means that she was not getting any better. While admitted in the ICU, they laid out all the possibilities of her survival. Not something that anyone wants to hear. My mom was in contact with the nurses all week. My mom, actually, worked at that same hospital about 9 years ago, and knew most of the nurses that were taking care of Grammy. My mom asked them to call her if things got really bad, and she needed to fly out to Utah. My mom got that call on THURSDAY, July 7. She booked a flight from Memphis, and was going to be in Utah on Friday, July 8 at about 5:00 pm. My uncle from Birmingham was also flying in on Friday evening.
On Sunday evening, my Grammy asked them in intubate her. After being intubated, if she was not off the ventilator in 4 days, she was most likely not going to be able to breathe on her own after that. On Thursday, things were not looking good. The pneumonia was not getting better. They asked my Grandpa for her living will. That's when it finally hit my Grandpa (and the rest of us) that things were was worse than we could have imagined. My Grammy and Grandpa had decided long ago that they would sign a DNR and stick to it. My Grandpa knew that this was the time that they had dreaded for a long time.
Trio #3 and I were down in Colorado working. Every time we got a phone call from either Mom of Trio #1, we dreaded it. We got a phone call on Friday afternoon from Mom that said that she was flying into Utah, and that they were taking Grammy off life-support on Saturday morning. We shut off our tractors, and rushed home to pack our bags. We left as soon as we could and drove the 6 hours to Provo. We went straight to Grandpa's house.
Everyone got into town on Friday night. They were able to take Grammy off the sedatives so that she could know that my Mom and Uncle Kevin were there. On Saturday morning, we all met for breakfast at Uncle Ricky's and Aunt Dawn's house. Then we all drove over to the hospital. It was a very somber experience. There were several of us there. It was Grammy's brother Perry, Grandpa, Mom, Trio #1, 2, 3, Uncle Kevin, Uncle Rick and Aunt Dawn, Aunt Mary Lynn and Uncle Scott. I cannot begin to tell you how grateful I was to be there, but sad at the same time because the last image I had of my Grammy was in the hospital bed, hooked up to lots of machines, and in pain.
The nurses took her off sedation for a little while so that we could all say goodbye to her. My cousin Robert's fiancee just had a baby boy, so they brought pictures of baby Talon Conrad to show her. We all told her goodbye and kissed her. Then, something spiritual took place. In our church, we believe that men of the church can be given the power to act in God's name. It is called the Priesthood. Through the priesthood, the men can give others a blessing. It is all done in God's name, and according to God's will. My Grandpa was the one to give her a blessing. He blessed her to pass quickly from this life and to rejoice in the world to come. He told her that she had accomplished a great work here on this earth in regards to Genealogy. He told her not to worry about us and to go peacefully. I cried so hard. He then told her he loved her, and closed the blessing. The Spirit of the Lord was soooo strong. I think it was one of the strongest I have ever felt in my life.
The nurses asked us to leave the room for just a moment while they re-sedated her, and took all the tubes out and turned most of the machines off. They told us to expect her to live for about 5 minutes. They told us we could come back in, and then left us to say goodbye. She looked soo much better after all the tubes were removed. We all stood around her bed, and watched her and the monitors. You could tell that she was more comfortable without all the tubes and machines, so she finally fell asleep, and even stated to snore. It was soo her. Her breathing started to slow down and were very slow. My Grammy is kinda stubborn, and showed her true colors those that few moments of her life. She actually lived exactly an hour after they unhooked all the machines. When she took her last breathe, it hits you hard. I have never cried soo incredibly hard in my life. We all just sat there in stunned silence not wanting to believe that she is truly gone. We all just sat in perfect silence that whole hour. Then we all slowly left her room after she was gone.
That was Saturday, July 9, at 12:55 pm. Trio #1's birthday is July 10, so luckily the curse did not hit us on her actual birthday. The next several days were all a blur. Going to bed was the hardest, because then when it was dark, you can just let the tears flow freely. Praying for Grandpa was also hard because you feel bad that he has to now live on his own.
In our church, we actually bury people in their temple clothes. They are all white, and represent the highest of covenants that we make with the Lord here on the earth, and then continue to keep once we have passed from this life, into the next. Only those who have been through the temple are allowed to see those clothes in their entirety. So, my mom, aunt, Trio #1, and I got to go dress my Grammy. She was already in her white temple dress, so we just added the accessories. My Grandpa was very adamant about her wearing her glasses, because that is what makes her look like her. I was nervous about seeing her, but was kinda willing to help out. I was putting on her knee-highs, and I touched her leg and she was freezing cold. She wasn't the Grammy that was warm and full of love and hugs for you at any time of the day. I totally lost it at that point. (I swear I didn't have full control over my tear ducts...) I wasn't able to help out again. Luckily my mom has done this multiple times, and was able to remain strong. Afterward, Grammy looked as amazing as anyone who is no longer here can.
After the funeral, and a luncheon, we were able to go up to the cemetery. Luckily, her burial place is really close to Trio #1 and Trio #2's apartment, so we can go take her flowers as often as possible. She is actually buried in a WALL, because she did not want to have anyone walk all over her, and she did not want any dirt thrown on her face. :o] It was so sweet because my Grandpa doesn't like standing up in front of people and talking, but he took a few moments to thank us all for coming and for loving her. He told us multiple times that he was hoping that she would live another 4 years. (We don't really know the significance of that amount of time...) He was very sweet and tender when talking about her.
I feel so blessed to have had Grammy in my life. I was very close to her. We spent many summers staying with her. She taught me how to quilt. We even made several quilts together. She taught me how to crochet, and was willing to make several projects together. She taught me how to play games, especially her favorite one "Oh Hell!". I learned how to play many different styles of solitaire, and loved spending many many hours playing games and sharing memories. She was unselfish in her teaching and always loves to give hugs and kisses. She will be missed, but I will keep her in my heart forever!!!
I'm sorry for your loss my friend!! BUt I am SO glad you were all able to be there with and her to be there together!
ReplyDeleteShe sounds liket he sweetest lady and I LOVE that picture of her and your grandpa together!!!